am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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