question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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