come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
