did you get engaged???
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Randomize
