that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
