Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
