yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
