I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Randomize
