would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize
