He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
You left your underwear on the fireplace
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
