Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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