shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Don't EVER smell your tampon
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
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