he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
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