i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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