It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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