Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
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