You don't have asthma, your pregnant
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize