Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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