I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Randomize
