i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
