I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize