For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
