oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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