Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
