Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize