i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
one might say we're banned from that church
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
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