just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
