do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Randomize
