I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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