so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
God I need to hump something, right now.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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