She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
