I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
