Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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