You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Randomize
