i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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