I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Sext me about skeletons
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
