i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
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