Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(404): View more from Georgia

Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!

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(404): Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food! http://tfl.nu/vzr5

Replies (26) Good night (7775) Bad night (695)
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(305): View more from Florida

just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins

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(305): just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins http://tfl.nu/ypgx

Replies (27) Good night (3916) Bad night (994)
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(828): View more from North Carolina

Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.

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(828): Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious. http://tfl.nu/m393

Replies (15) Good night (7066) Bad night (898)
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(774): View more from Massachusetts

According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.

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(774): According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth. http://tfl.nu/1yfv

Replies (16) Good night (3001) Bad night (2853)
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(604): View more from British Columbia

He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.

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(604): He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route. http://tfl.nu/lmqa

Replies (4) Good night (827) Bad night (4307)
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(330): View more from Ohio

I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America

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(330): I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America http://tfl.nu/nfrq

Replies (24) Good night (6914) Bad night (1158)
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(305): View more from Florida

Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.

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(305): Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer. http://tfl.nu/0a2y

Replies (10) Good night (4645) Bad night (956)
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(815): View more from Illinois

It would be one hovered percent delicioui

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(815): It would be one hovered percent delicioui http://tfl.nu/wb9b

Replies (6) Good night (1802) Bad night (802)
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(623): View more from Arizona

just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.

(623): View more from Arizona

and by single i mean slutty

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(623): just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single. (623): and by single i mean slutty http://tfl.nu/aczn

Replies (12) Good night (3657) Bad night (1138)
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(301): View more from Maryland

Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?

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(301): Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you? http://tfl.nu/njmw

Replies (7) Good night (2423) Bad night (810)
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(512): View more from Texas

She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?

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(512): She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera? http://tfl.nu/jfva

Replies (9) Good night (2115) Bad night (660)
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(260): View more from Indiana

I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.

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(260): I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is. http://tfl.nu/8her

Replies (16) Good night (1577) Bad night (1031)
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(323): View more from California

I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw

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(323): I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw http://tfl.nu/ax52

Replies (8) Good night (907) Bad night (1333)
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(765): View more from Indiana

He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.

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(765): He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified. http://tfl.nu/qdiz

Replies (10) Good night (1209) Bad night (648)
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(602): View more from Arizona

I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?

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(602): I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this? http://tfl.nu/l650

Replies (4) Good night (847) Bad night (461)

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