He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee