Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
