Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
