I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize