Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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