I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
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Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
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Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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