So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
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