Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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