Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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