don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
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