Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
