That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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